That'll Show Him!

            I may or may not have an issue with my tongue. I do not have an eloquent way of “calling people out.” When I think someone has an issue with me… if they look at me wrong, I will immediately jump to conclusions and will usually confront this individual and not give them an option as to whether or not they want to address it with me… There have been times when this has come back to bite me, and others have led to restoration, and I was able to fix whatever I did wrong. Now, if I have a problem with them… that’s another story. I will typically just distance myself and leave it alone… until it comes to my husband!

            I am going to say it… I despise… hate… loath!!!!! That that man can go to sleep when he knows I am angry with him! Who does he think he is? I will toss myself around in the bed to try shaking it so he can’t sleep peacefully (the man can sleep anywhere, so it doesn’t work). I will conveniently forget something or two things or three or four… in the living room so I can slam the door multiple times… We have a door to our bathroom attached to our bedroom, so I will go in there and turn the light on and leave the door open as if THAT will wake him up! I know… I showed him, didn’t I? I am irrational and just a terrible human to be around. Yet he sleeps through it all without a care in the world! Or so I assume… My problem is that I am a control freak, and I want him to respond in MY way… I grew up in a family that addressed issues immediately and did not allow things to fester, where he did not. He grew up in a family that avoids all confrontations. Things are bottled up and ignored. The longer you ignore the issue, it will go away. That is not true when I am around! He learned this lesson early in our marriage.

            God has taught me throughout the years and through different circumstances that I must stop being this way. Jake doesn’t need to respond how I think he does. God has taught me that when I leave him alone and allow him to sleep on it… God works on him without my chirping. I always want to create Jake’s conviction and remorse, but in turn, God has shown me mine! It is not my job to work on Jake’s heart; it’s God’s, and I just get in the way when I get angry and throw a tantrum or spew mean words to make him feel manufactured conviction. God has taught me to shut my mouth and allow Him to work because I am just getting in the way of my controlling nature.

            Is there something that you are trying to control? Maybe you aren’t throwing a tantrum or creating manufactured convictions like I have, but perhaps there is something that you need to relinquish and allow God to handle. It could be a situation, a relationship, a job… anything. Try to enable God to work. Listen to His prodding because He will handle it how He sees fit, and things will work out better than you think. I certainly have! Having allowed God to take control and work in Jake’s heart has been a complete game changer in my life and Jake’s life. Jake has grown closer to Christ, and so have I. I also do not carry the burden of being my husband’s conscience. Let God show you today that He really can handle your problems.

Romans 8:28 (KJV)

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.